Die! Die!

Feeling random, so this is what you get. Sometime soon, I will announce something or another. Keep your britches on until then. Or, keep them off.

• Phil quizzes me most weeks before he heads out to host a Geeks Who Drink quiz at the Irish Hound (read Phil's blog here). My score is sometimes the best, sometimes not. The highest scoring teams receive gift certificates, free beer, or assorted gadgets and odd trinkets. What is my prize? I get to sleep with the quiz master. I doubt the other teams receive orgasms for their efforts. Or, um... Phil?
  

• In keeping with our longstanding tradition of destroying our personal items, Phil managed to throw our camera on the floor. The battery compartment broke. Now, if we want to take pictures, we must hold it shut for our dear lives, breaking off fingers in the process. I actually need the camera now, for reasons I will not tell you yet. I suppose I'm now in the market for a new soul stealer (camera, not husband). You know that American Indians didn't want their pictures taken because they thought it would steal their souls, right? Right. I'm actually glad that the camera is busted. Not only does it steal your soul, but it would take weird blue pictures that were difficult to adjust. Maybe that's the color of souls leaving the nest. So, I need a new device to steal souls in higher mega pixels and with better color adjustment (for maximum stealing, you see).
  

• Amos is in love with the playground. Except, he doesn't know that it's called the playground. Everything is the slide. The slide! The slide! He yells it out as soon as he sees the shiny red, blue and yellow parts of the playground equipment. Ah, but only if it were so innocent. He actually yells out, "Die! Die!" in the most sinister, angelic voice you've ever heard. He runs around the house telling us to die. I am raising Damien, The Omen. I guess it's good for me that we don't live in a two-story house with a balcony. Also, I will not allow Amos to ride a tricycle indoors. EVER. Amos sometimes also seems to speak in tongues. Coincidence? I think not. *wondering if I should shave his head and look for 666*

• Phil and I might have a date soon. A real, actual adult date involving two grownups. This lady right here is in sore need of a night out with a man. At this point, any man will do. I just. NEED. A. DATE. A silly neighbor volunteered to take care of Damien. She has been warned about being told to die.

• Watching too much childrens' television will cause you to go wacky, not unlike the Jack Nicholson character in The Shining. All Dora and Wubbzy makes Sarah a dull girl. All Diego and Wonder Pets makes Sarah want to drop kick the TV and tear the heads off of stuffed monkeys.

• Did I mention that I need a date?

Also, in case you haven't tired of me just yet, head over yonder to that crazy lady Sarcastic Mom. I am the guest blogger on her fence today. Just a sittin' on that ol' fence and sayin' thangs. And chewin' on straw. Chawin' and tawkin'.