Once again, I hand the mic over to Phil Porter, guest blogger and stand-up comedian extraordinaire / husband / father / great-in-the-sack.
At this point, you’ve probably seen the Tom Cruise video where he expounds on the virtues of Scientology, makes weird faces, and laughs in a freakishly inappropriate way.
If you haven’t seen it, you’re better off watching the many parodies that have popped up online. My favorites are by Jerry O’Connell and Eugene Mirman.
(Sarah adds: This one from Craig Ferguson is worth watching as well.)
However, if you have seen the video, you’ve heard
I’m not qualified to answer the first two questions, but I will assure you that the answer to riddle number C is a firm “No.” I will not be slapping you around with my ethics. If I drive by a car accident that you’re in, will I stop to help? Yes, but I will not be helping with my ethics. When I laugh awkwardly and make weird faces, am I trying to trick you with my ethics? No, I am not. I am simply awkward and have a tendency to make strange faces. When I release a giant blockbuster summer action thriller, am I trying to take your hard-earned movie-watching dollars and apply them to the building of an ethics machine that will ethically ethic you with ethic ethics? No, I am not. Because that question doesn’t even make sense.
I hope this eases your mind.
Praise Xenu.
9 beautiful people muttered something back:
Heheheheheh. What I really love is the link to "Perfect Strangers." Who the hell went to all that trouble to distinguish the fictional foods, customs, and "fun facts" of his made-up country? Good grief, Wikipedia.
Yeah, I think your next blog should be a tribute to Balki Bartokomous. I loved him and wanted to have his Myposian babies.
Maybe I will start a religion based on the fictional world of Mypos and call it Bartokomology. Instead of laughing in an insane way, we will just do the Dancy of Joy and shout "Hey!" And people will pay lots of money to join our club, because they'll see us dancing and just "know."
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*fistovermouthcough*HA! (I wish I could teleport turds. What an awesome superpower to have.)
After being intrigued enough by this blog see what KFC/KCR? is, I turned, of course, to Wikipedia to give me answers! And -
I just realized that my son's favorite kids' show is trying to brainwash him with Scientology!
So, Jack's Big Music Show has an episode called "Space Opera," which is also what Hubbard describes as alien interference in earthly events.
Damn you, Xenu! You have taken over children's television!
I love Phil.
And your new template.
Both wonderful.
AWESOME! I hadn't seen any of these. What a freak. I just happened to put him on a post tonight, coincidently.
I hadn't watched the Cruise video yet, and just did. Huh?? I listened intently, but he didn't actually say anything, did he? The only thing I got is that Scientologists are better than other people. Not very appealing.
I'm going to join amanda's new religion!
I hadn't seen the Cruise video, and had to stop it about half-way through. Just can't handle all that. Is the man in need of a psychiatrist, a good, swift kick, or maybe an emetic? He seems to be full of something that he would feel better without.
We use to get Perfect Strangers over here. Do you think that the writers have watched Andy Kaufman in Taxi? Balki/Lakta the same person?
Although I must say that Perfect Strangers was funny.
Clicked on the Tom Cruise video- "We're sorry, this video is no longer available."
Now, I really want to see it.
I have to admit, I used to own a copy of Dianetics and had read it and was intrigued about the whole concept of silent birth. I did not know about any of the Xenu stuff. Wow!
I'm back to being a lapsed Catholic, by the way.
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