Sometimes I am amazed by the things I will shove into my pie hole. Take today, for instance.
I've been complaining to Phil that our love life has been suffering longer lapses than normal due to this thing called "parenting." Oh, woe is me. Ain't gettin' the nookie. Perhaps I've discovered why we are repulsing each other. Both of us have consumed tuna salad and coffee today. Have you ever had tuna salad and coffee together? The stink is horrendous. I imagine it smells like a dying fish walked into a rundown coffee house and just gave up and died on the cabin floor. Ah, but it is delicious, this dead cabin floor tuna.
I must apologize to my son. He is on the receiving end of the stink emerging from his parents' mouths. Poor Amos. No wonder he doesn't want to eat much.
So, I wonder, what other foods are destined to repulse those in the immediate vicinity?
As a child, I would shake violently from the smell of Doritos coming from someone's head. Schools are cruel in that they allow children to purchase bags of Doritos and then expose their classmates to the smell of old cheese and dirty feet. I guarantee that if a little boy liked me, he would not succeed in wooing me with his Dorito breath. Now, if I ate the Doritos, then it was a different matter. Stink = delicious.
Garlic, of course, is an old timey villain of odor. I remember going to The Olive Garden as a young'n, only to wake up the next day with my mother creaking my bedroom door back and forth to try to waft the garlic air out of existence.
When I was pregnant, my nose was out of control at times. During a trip to Philadelphia when I was about 13 weeks along, Phil decided to eat a Philly cheesesteak. Oh. My. God. I couldn't go near him. My pregnant body would not tolerate the scent of onions. And then he had to throw in all of those other stinks on top of onions. It was heartbreaking to see Phil's face as he realized he couldn't come near me, but good grief, man. Don't expect a pregnant woman to salivate over your onion-soaked body.
So, I wonder...
What foods offend your senses?
Friday, October 26, 2007
stink + stink = delicious
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10 beautiful people muttered something back:
I really hate the smell of Stew and the smell of Gabage.
Ah, but what kind of stew? I had steak and kidney pie while in London, but I'm not sure that qualifies as stink stew (it did qualify as delicious). It was right after the mad cow scare, and England was suddenly serving up beef again. Insane beef, that is...
Beef Stew, I love beef but put it in a stew and it smells foul. As for mad english beef, we only eat Welsh beef here I don't think it was as mad.
One of the ads that came up for this blog was, "Smell Vagina." Not "Smelly Vagina," which is what it seemed to be related to, just "Smell Vagina." They may want to be more precise in the wording of that ad; otherwise, they're going to be getting hits from all the wrong kinds of people. I can only imagine that it was the combination of stink, nookie, and tuna that caused this ad to appear.
I should probably stay anonymous for this comment.
-Bert
The other day I opened a bag of ranch flavored rice cake snacks. John was standing nearby, but didn't see the bag.
[Alarmed look on John's face]
"Did you just fart?"
I replied by telling him he might not want to try the rice cake snacks.
"Smell Vagina" and "ranch-flavored rice cakes" - two potentials for band names. Smell Vagina would probably have some trouble becoming commercially viable, me thinks.
Although, it's a good porn name.
Ranch-flavored anything probably wrinkles the nose of any passerby. Ah, but again: stink = delicious.
I can't stand the smell of coffee and haven't been able to since I was just pregnant.
I used to be an avid coffee drinker too :( now it makes me retch.
Coffee I can do. I enjoyed the smell of it while pregnant, which made me an odd preggie. Onions, however... egad. I forbade onions from being anywhere near Phil's mouth the entire 9 months.
jayne could not stand onions when pregnant.
I hate the smell of chicken, smoked fish, but worst of all.. CIDER !! always makes me hurl !!
Nothing more than what you mentioned bothers me now.
However when I was pregnate I could not go any where near food. Any food. It would send me potty hugging to be in the same room with food. Someone cooking? I would have to leave the house. I could not stand food being cooked. I had to microwave meals for my children with my youngest. Or join friends for dinner by providing them with food as long as they were willing to cook and feed my children for me! It was bad!
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